shine brighter this Fall

The only people for me are the mad ones,

 the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved,

 desirous of everything at the same time,

 the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing,

 but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles

exploding like spiders across the stars….

 ~Jack Kerouac~

Namaste,

I’d like to share with you the journey that I’ve been on this summer, as it’s been such a profound experience of moving from darkness into light. This summer proved to be a very difficult time for my family and me as we mourned the sudden and unexpected loss of my sister’s husband, Scott.

In the midst of this grief, I have been sifting through the darkness, trying to find a little bit of light. What I've found is a whole lot of light and love. I witnessed it in the strong and supportive network of friends, neighbors, and coworkers that surrounded my sister, her kids, and our family. I experienced it in my relationship and ten days of hiking and healing in the beautiful Pacific Northwest with my boyfriend, Leo, who has been so supportive as I’ve been moving through the grieving process.

And I find it in my memory of Scott. He always lived life so fully and brightly. Even in his unexpected passing, he made sure that his family was taken care of, and that they had the greatest last weekend together. Scott was an amazing big brother and each time we spoke he’d make sure to tell me how awesome he thought I was and took that time to make me feel brighter. I want to remember Scott by how he lived and bring more of that energy into my life.

My intention for the rest of this year and beyond is to burn even brighter. What does it mean to burn brighter? To me, it means that I feel more of that fiery passion for life. I don't let things like fear get in my way.  

My yoga & meditation practice, relationships, business, and daily life are going to be all about building, maintaining, and using my inner fire to transform that which I don’t need anymore so I can SHINE!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The time is now and I want you to join me.

Here are a few ways that you can work on building your light. 

Be Inspired

I have 3 spaces open for private study with me. If you’d like to learn how to use the tools of yoga, meditation, and Ayurveda to manage your energy and feel more balanced and inspired in your daily life, let’s talk about how that can happen. Contact me for more details on the private programs that I offer.

Ignite Inner Wisdom: a 6-week Meditation Series

This course is for new and experienced meditation practitioners. You’ll learn the techniques of Tantric meditation that I’ve practiced, studied, and found so effective in my life.  You’ll utilize kriya (visualization) and mantra (sound) techniques to help you find steadiness and inspiration...every day.

Tuesdays 6-7pm in Northern Liberties

September 17-October 22

$120, email Meg to register

only 6 spaces available 

I’m a featured teacher at Philly Area Yoga’s: Namas Day 2013!!!

Sunday, October 6-ALL DAY  

This is a day-long yoga festival with amazing teachers from around the Philadelphia area sharing their unique teachings. I’ll be leading this lecture and complete practice:

The Alchemy of Fire: Unlocking Your Inner Power 

(Session 4    3:30-5:15pm)

The cultivation of inner fire, or tejas, is at the heart of Tantric practices. The teachings state that with mastery of the body’s energy and cultivation of fire at the navel, everything is possible. Weaving together the tools of asana (postures), bandha (energy locks), mantra (chanting), pranayama (breathwork), and meditation, this workshop will lead the practitioner in experiencing the innate power of body, mind, and spirit. Participants will leave with clarity and inspiration about how to incorporate this practice into daily life.

Register for the entire day here.  Individual workshop tickets go on sale September 1 (if space is available) so email me if you’d like to only register for my workshop and I’ll notify you when you can!

I look forward to connecting with you on and off the mat this Fall. 

Be well, and remember:

“The inner fire is the most important thing mankind possesses.”

~Edith Sodergran~

Meg Townsend, E-RYT500

~Om Satyei Namaha~

Choppy Chop Chop!

October Do Something The Scares Me 

A photo montage of something that terrified me....as I've never seen myself like this in my entire life....rediscovering beauty:)

That leaf was not in my hair when he cut it all off:)

Travis is awesome, and a yogi to boot!

I have mostly included this because the cute dog with the devil suit in the background may just overshadow my awesome hair

September: A Fear Conquered

At some point in the past few weeks I decided that it's time for me to do things that scare me, at least once a month! I want to be more fearless in all aspects of life! As with anything, it takes practice, so what better way than to choose things that scare me or make me nervous, AND THEN DO THEM. Actually follow through.  I did just that tonight, and let me tell you what, I feel amazing. *my legs may not feel so amazing in the morning, but it's a small price to pay*

Tonight I attended my first West African Dance class. Now you may scoff at this and say, "oh Meg, what's so scary about that? It's just a little dancing with drums." 

Let me whisper a little secret in your ear....I feel like I'm a TERRIBLE dancer.  I do!

My friend and fellow yogi, Dawn, was leading the class and has been asking me to come to one for a few months now, so I decided today was the day. Face those fears of being uncoordinated, muppet-like, ungraceful, and judged by all....and dance it out Miss Yogini!

SO I DID.  AND I FEEL AWESOME.

The class was at the studio that I work, Amrita Yoga in Fishtown. It's a beautiful space, it was a beautiful Friday evening, there were amazingly talented live drummers (I mean AMAZING) and of course the beautiful and inspiring Dawn at the helm, leading the way. It was all ladies at the class, and it was so nice to be in the company of other sweet souls. Dawn did an amazing job at creating this safe space for us to explore our bodies and the rhythms.

I think it's been a long time since I've had that much fun. There were times when I was totally confused as to what was going on and messed up some steps, and I didn't even care. I think there was one moment when I judged myself, and I recognized that is a part of me, and I told it that it was welcome to stay around if it wanted, but I was just going to keep giving it my all. And that voice became quiet:)

It was such an amazing experience at watching the mind do it's thing, and tapping into something that naturally moved my body and spirit. Near the end she had us all in a circle and we each had to dance a solo in the center. OH. MY. GOODNESS. Five years ago I would've dropped dead in the scenario. Like, literally, that is my worst nightmare, "what, ME, dance freestyle in front of a group?!?"

Tonight, I threw caution to the wind and I got into that circle and I moved my body, and I felt held up and supported by amazing women, and it was so freeing! I DANCED A SOLO IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CIRCLE. I've never done that, not even under the influence of alcohol have I had the courage to do something like that.

I am no longer fearful of this dance thing. In fact, I can't wait until the next one! (Next week in West Chester...I'm there)

Stay tuned for next month's issue of A FEAR CONQUERED.  What will the yogini do next?

More importantly......what fear will you face this month? I'd love to know your story!

Love & Light,

Meg

The Moment We All Came Together Today

I witnessed something amazing today.  I feel blessed that I was there at such a time, and that even though I was walking my bike and talking to my good friend, I still noticed a beautiful act of love.

Scene: the crazy city of Philadelphia, intersection of 19th st and chestnut st, known for: lots of people in a rush, crazy drivers, high intensity center city action!

What Happened: I saw a 30-40 something man helping an older woman with a walker and her friend across the street.  This wasn't just any run-of-the-mill old lady crossing....bless this woman's heart, she was putting all her worldly might into every centimeter-long stride.  Her friend was right there by her side....but when a street crossing can almost compare to an English Channel crossing in energy spent....it's probably nice when a younger man comes along to stand by your side and touch your back to make sure that you safely get across.

If that wasn't enough beauty and love to witness for one day....introducing now: the cars waiting at the stop light.  When the light turned green and the woman wasn't even halfway across the street, guess what happened.  EVERYONE WAITED.  not only did they wait, they didn't even honk, or look impatient, or throw their arms up in stress that they were going to be late because of what was happening in front of their car.  NO ONE HONKED....not even the many cars behind the first cars at the light.  NO ONE HONKED! IN PHILADELPHIA!  did I mention one of those cars at the front was a cab?  cab didn't honk either.

And they waited.....and they all missed the light....and they waited patiently for this woman to fight her way to take every step.  As if they understood that their problems and needs could wait, because something much more difficult and valiant was taking place before their eyes.

And it took my breath away.  And if I hadn't been on the phone, I probably would've cried.

And I feel like everyone who was in that moment, who saw what I saw, felt something amazing....someone struggling, and someone loving and helping them.  What an act of pure love and compassion can do and spread!

It's Tapas, baby!

"Courage is almost always a necessary ingredient of change. Fulfilling your potential and achieving your destiny demand that at some point you stand on your own. Your blossoming will need to be unlike anyone else’s; just as every double helix of DNA is unique, so is every person’s path."

    ~The Four Desires Book by Rod Stryker~

I've faced an interesting set of challenges these past few months.  Challenges that have really shaken me to the core as to whether this path I am on is the right one for me.  I love what I do more than anything in the world, but it has it's own unique challenge, at least at the point that I am right now.  Almost a year ago, I took the leap out of the secure, full-time restaurant gig and tipped the scales to depending on yoga teaching more than anything else for my livelihood.  It was scary but at the time, I felt like it was my only choice (I was going to shrivel up and die inside if I didn't)....I had to jump.  So I did.  And the universe provided me with more teaching opportunities!

Long story short, these past few months have been rough, not as dependable as before, scary, no cushion to break my fall sort of rough.  I felt resistance rising in me, I started to think that everyone was judging me for this choice that I made to leave stability to pursue my dream (it can't be easy to be friends with or date someone that literally has no extra money to do anything social), I felt like I needed an escape route....something solid and dependable to get me through it.

I went out looking for additional serving jobs (I work one night a week at a lovely little BYOB), I walked confidently with resume in hand knowing anyone would want to hire me, every place I went was very interested and ready to hire me.  Then I started to listen to my body.  My mind was trying to rationalize this move, saying I could get through it, if only for a year.....my body was giving me major signals.  That's the week my shoulder pain was so unbearable I finally sought help for it (thank you Dr. Jenna....I am shoulder-pain free now and got there in a very non-invasive way!!!)  Interesting that the shoulder that is affected just so happens to be the arm that I use so frequently in waiting tables.  Interesting how I had this nagging shoulder pain for almost a year and I'd just accepted that it was going to be there.  I also just had this subtle, deep rooted panicked feeling at all times.  My body was telling me very clearly what I didn't want to listen to....you have to TRUST what is being lined up for you.

Then, out of the blue....three yoga opportunities fell out of the sky.  I had my answer, "ok universe, this is what I should be doing."  I told all the possible restaurant jobs that I'd decided to go in another direction, and I jumped, yet again, into the terrifying unknown.

So that's where I am currently residing, post-second-terrifying-leap-into-fate land.

I feel blessed this chain of "coincidences" that has brought me to this point, and I've realized that it's time for me to get out of my own way.  I have, and always have had, quite a nasty self-destructive side.  I'm finally aware of this pattern in my life and ready to work on it....because it's getting in the way of the amazing potential I have for living brilliantly in this world!

"Yes.  You can attain freedom from the unwanted part of yourself by detaching yourself from it.  Nothing more.  Liberation by detachment from the world is not my way.  Higher than detachment is transforming what you want to get rid of."

~Rabindranath Tagore~

"Ok, Miss Yogini....how does one transform a deeply rooted pattern??"

TAPAS, BABY!!

"I thought that was small plates in the style of Spanish dining."

In the yoga tradition, tapas translates to heat, to purify, fiery discipline, to break down the things that prevent our natural light.  It's developing character and refinement and putting your effort into the world for your visions, goals, and dreams to come into fruition. It's what helps you shine.  

"Tapas when done correctly becomes tejas-the radiant splendor of personality that expresses itself as courage, creativity, and love as well as the melting tenderness that draws all hearts (charisma)."

~Para Yoga Master Training Manual~

There are many tapas disciplines, as there are many unique ways we each need purify to bring out our own shining.  A few examples are changing diet, exercise, asana (purifies mind, nervous system, and energetic body), breathwork, breaking bad habits, and silence.


Some of these are a little less accessible if you don't have a teacher knowledgeable in these areas or if your practice isn't quite at the point where you're ready for them.  Fear not! When I'm teaching tapas in my classes, I encourage my students to look at what they are wanting to achieve, and what is lying in their way to achieving it.  We can use certain techniques to increase our own fire.  

For example: Student A craves more meaningful connections and relationships with people.  Student A talks....A LOT, talks talks talks all the time, never stops talking or thinking....Student A has learned this behavior as a way to seemingly connect with someone or perhaps to mask their own social anxiety, but their talk gets in the way of actual connection with the person....they leave no space to slow down and listen to what anyone has to say.  Student A's tapas practice could be silence.  Student A could commit to a week or more of speaking only when absolutely necessary.  For some people this seems silly, but for Student A, this silence could make them a little uncomfortable and encourage them to slow down a bit and just watch what's going on in their mind, and truly LISTEN to those around them instead of assuaging their discomfort around connection with chatter.


What do you deeply desire in your life?  What are you doing and maybe not realizing or admitting to yourself that's getting in the way of your living vibrantly?  Please share with me and let's get your internal fire a-burnin!!

In this moment......

Yoga isn't just a series of poses that you do on a mat.  The word yoga roughly translates to mean "union." We've all had moments of yoga....a time when you're just plugged into the moment...when the mind stops ticking away and you're just present.  My first yoga teacher called them "peak experiences."  Some people have these peak experiences while engrossed in music, some when doing something athletic, I've never experienced childbirth but I'm pretty sure some achieve a state of yoga then, some of us have these experiences in nature.  They are usually those points in life that you can remember almost perfectly, no matter how much time passes.

My experiences of yoga happen most often in nature.  The pictures in this posting are from a very special moment of yoga in my life.  A few years ago I took myself on a little roadtrip around Northern CA.  It was a trip filled with moments of pure bliss and connection to myself and to nature.  I didn't make any plans, I just knew where I'd stay each night, and that was it.  This particular moment happened when I was winding down from a fun day of kayaking and eating fresh oysters with total strangers.  I was staying a few days at Point Reyes National Seashore, about an hour north of San Francisco.  That evening I decided to head to Limantour Beach to watch the sun set.  It was windy and cold but I was determined to see the sun set over the beach.

I got to the beach and was alone, except for a lady who was dancing in the wind:

You can barely see the wind dancing lady, she's right above my shadow

I took off my sneakers and plunged my feet into the waves even though the September water was freezing!  The wind was blowing burning salty sand on my weary legs but I didn't care.  I had my camera out, madly capturing the beauty around me that was breathtaking.  I got there early enough that the sun was still high in the sky, yet rapidly making it's descent to the horizon and I was transfixed.  I walked along the water towards the setting sun, soaking in the beauty and simplicity of the moment.  I said aloud, "Universe....send me some dolphins!  I want to see dolphins!!" I turned my head to look at the water and this is what I saw, not dolphins but:

A pair of funny little seals poking their heads out and staring at me.  They seemed to be just as fascinated with me as I was with them.  As I walked toward the sun, they kept pace with me in the water, showing off their wave-riding moves, poking their heads out every so often to look at me and make sure I was still watching them. 

Eventually the seals swam off when they realized I'd lost myself in the sunset.  I was absorbed in beauty, dissolved in contentment, no longer separate from the beach, or the sunset, or the wind, or the sand.....I was in union with it all.  As the sun dipped down into the horizon, I watched, waiting for the golden orb to slip silently to rest.

That's why I practice yoga.  That's why I get on the mat and breathe and watch....to tap into and witness that part of myself that is all of this.  The part that is the brilliant sunset, the playful seals, the wind-dancing woman, the crashing waves.  To bring that essence to every moment of every day.

on hate and dog poop

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
- Prayer of St. Francis

The recent killing of a prominent figurehead of hatred had me somberly pondering all day yesterday.  This celebration of his death strikes me as unfortunate for those who are celebrating.  I understand that with vengeance comes a certain sense of closure, but why?  Why must we practice an eye for an eye to regain a feeling of peace in our hearts?  Please don't get me wrong, this man had very unfortunate and very strong karmas that led him to act in the way that he did, and it is a good thing that he will not be able to lead and inspire people towards hatred anymore.....but with his death, hatred did not die.  Terrorism is not obliterated.  Anger has not ceased.  The more we deceive ourselves with that, the more the feeling of separateness increases....leading to fear and ultimately more hatred.  

The more we make ourselves feel separate and/or better than other human beings, the more susceptible we become to this.   Anger is anger.  Hate is hate.  Fear is fear....no matter what the scale and intensity of the emotion is, it still has the same essence.  All these things exist not just in far-off lands, but on our own soil, in the 1 mile radius that you live, even in your mind and probably in your heart at times.  

How can you start to change yourself to increase the light?  I invite you to open your heart, look at what's inside, and work fill it with love, pure love; not resistance, not fear, not indifference; but LOVE & LIGHT.

I've been looking at my own choices today and to lighten things up a bit, I have a bit of a funny story to share with you on this.  Most of my work I do to help increase the light and spread love, but I too am human and many a time fall into the trap of my own thoughts and reactions to things, usually when I've strayed too much from my practice.  Case in point....the mysterious dog-owner on my block that has yet to pick up their dog's poop.  I've been enraged for an entire week, waging a war against this person in my mind.  I took it a little further and made a sign and hung it near a pile of said poo:

no judging my sign-making skills

Yesterday morning, I walked out the front door to find a huge pile right outside our house.  WELL....I was FURIOUS (in a still lightly humorous way:) and was yelling at my roomie that the war was ON!!!!  I pedaled my way to teach my first class, vowing that I'd stay up all night patrolling the front of the house, waiting for the irresponsible pooper to strike, fantasizing of how I'd approach this person.  Would I give them a nice verbal lashing?  Would I hurl the poop and the offender?  Would I quietly stalk them back to their home and just smear their dogs poop all over their front stoop?  My mind was burning with ideas.  Thank goodness I taught all day so my teaching, and reflection on the bigger events in the world brought me back to the ground and I realized that I should take my threatening sign down, and am thinking I'll replace it with something like this: 

"Dear Person who doesn't pick up after their dog, we love our beautiful block and hope you do too, and we'd like to keep it clean please!  Here are some baggies in case your left yours at home, please feel free to use one:)"

And with that, the tiny seed of anger that is in my heart, that I have also spread into the world a bit, hopefully my righting my actions and words will help burn this seed. 

What seeds in your heart or mind, however small or large they may be, do YOU need to examine, learn from, and burn?  Think about this over the week.  Keep your heart open, contribute to love and light.

"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. Instead of diminishing evil, it multiplies it. Through violence you may murder the liar, but you cannot murder the lie, nor establish the truth. Through violence you may murder the hater, but you do not murder hate. In fact, violence merely increases hate. So it goes. Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that. "

Martin Luther King Jr.

"Where do we go from here: Chaos or community?" (1967)